


even an imagination feels sweet

by hannah_dul_set



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Childhood Memories, Finger Sucking, Friends to Lovers, Hand Jobs, M/M, Making Out, bit of angst but not for long, donghyuck sweet baby who just loves strawberries
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-20
Updated: 2021-02-20
Packaged: 2021-03-17 09:35:43
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,732
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29590806
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hannah_dul_set/pseuds/hannah_dul_set
Summary: mark knew that friends didn’t look at their other friends like this. not with rose-tinted glasses and a sense of wanting that he could never really place. but right now, he wanted. he’d had donghyuck for over a decade - they’d had each other - but he wanted more.~a strawberry stained retrospective of mark and donghyuck’s childhood memories, leading up to the moment they had always been headed to.
Relationships: Lee Donghyuck | Haechan & Mark Lee, Lee Donghyuck | Haechan/Mark Lee
Comments: 20
Kudos: 209





	even an imagination feels sweet

_dipped you inside my white heart and made it red_

☆

donghyuck had always been a lonely child, but not due to any fault of his own. he would have loved to have had a big group of friends who all went to each other's birthday parties and had sleepovers and were close, but that never happened for him. 

on his first day of nursery - regretfully one of donghyuck’s earliest memories - he had been overzealous in attempting to make friends with his new classmates. his mother had told him that morning to just be his lovely self and everyone would want to be his friend, but looking back he thinks he came on far too strong. perhaps immediately asking every new kid he met if they wanted to share his strawberries at lunchtime, ignoring the fact that his mother had definitely only packed enough for one hungry mouth, was strange to the rest of his class. 

when the children were allowed their lunches, donghyuck ended up sat alone at a table eating his sandwich and strawberries. the teachers, seeing this heartbreaking image, tried to encourage donghyuck to sit with his classmates. however he was too put out to enjoy the rest of his first day, which he had been looking forward to for weeks now. he finished his food quietly, and spent the afternoon by himself wishing for the school day to end.

when his mother collected him in the playground donghyuck couldn’t contain his emotions any longer. big warm tears cascaded down his cheeks, and he was so choked up he couldn’t even tell his mother what had happened until they arrived at home 30 minutes later. she sat him down in the kitchen and made him a cup of sweet warm milk, and crouched down in front of him. 

“listen to me, donghyuck. i’m so sorry the other children weren’t nice to you today, but tomorrow is a new day,” his mother said to him, wiping his tears away. “there will be new children joining the class soon, and i just know you’re going to have the best time there. and if you’re not having fun we can find a new school for you to go to, okay?” she looked deep in donghyuck’s big eyes, still watery with fresh tears threatening to spill over.

he sniffed and nodded meekly and she pulled him into a comforting hug, pressing a kiss into his hair. she pulled back after a long moment with a smile on her face to try and cheer her son up. “we’ll start fresh tomorrow! can you give me a smile, duckie?” she pinched his cheek to which he couldn’t hold back his grin. 

but the day after didn’t go much better. word had spread between the children not to sit with ‘the weird kid’. even as new students joined their class they would be coaxed into ignoring donghyuck by the others. 

his mother had made preparations to move him to a new school, but donghyuck loved his teachers so much he couldn’t bear to switch. they offered him the support he needed to get through his first year of schooling along with his mother, which was good enough for donghyuck.

so every day he sat alone and quietly ate his strawberries.

☆

the coming years of education passed by mostly the same for donghyuck. he never really recovered from the first impression his classmates had of him and remained a loner at school for a few years. he had some friends from his music class that he went to every other weekend - renjun, jaemin, and jeno were great fun to be around and didn’t judge donghyuck for his fruit snack choices. they lived a bit too far away for more regular playtime, so donghyuck cherished those weekend classes together with all his heart. he was thankful to have any friends at all, even if he could only see them a couple of times a month, as his school life was as lonely as ever.

that was until his class had a new student from overseas. as their teacher introduced him to the class, he stood awkwardly looking fiercely at the floor and twisting his fingers together in what could only be a painful way. 

“this is mark lee. he’s just moved here all the way from canada - isn’t that exciting! i want you all to be welcoming to your new classmate and make him feel included in our activities.” she touched gently mark on the shoulder and he flinched, looking up quickly at the thirty faces staring back at him. donghyuck noted that his eyes were very watery and red, and he had a tissue crumpled up in his fist. “there’s a seat free next to donghyuck if you want to go sit next to him?” 

upon hearing his name, donghyuck perked up and waved his hand eagerly to invite the new boy over. mark shuffled across the classroom to where donghyuck was sat alone in the back corner, gingerly sitting down in the chair next to him. 

“hi i’m donghyuck! my last name is lee too - same as yours! i’m 7 years old and my birthday is june 6th. my favourite animal is a pudu and my favourite colour is red! what’s yours?” donghyuck was positively beaming at mark even though the other boy hadn’t moved his gaze from the desk in front of him. after a moment of silence, donghyuck changed tactics. “um, do you want to share my strawberries at lunch? my mom always packs lots.” he offered the boy an encouraging smile. 

mark looked up at him, tears threatening to spill over and run down his cheeks. he smiled meekly and nodded his head. “thank you,” he all but whispered, his voice cracking slightly. 

the two boys sat outside on the grass together at lunch time, the tupperware full of strawberries placed between them as they ate with their fingers. 

“um. i’m 8, and my birthday is august 2nd. i guess my favourite animal is a tiger? and um... i don’t think i have a favourite colour,” mark spoke. his voice was still quiet with nerves and donghyuck had to strain a little to hear him, but he was much less tearful now than he had been at the start of the day. 

donghyuck pondered for a moment. “well, i can help you pick a favourite colour - its important,” and he nodded with purpose. “what about food? my favourite is strawberries! my mom packs them for me every day.” he picked up a slice of the fruit in front of him and happily popped it into his mouth, relishing the sweetness of it. 

mark paused to think, his arm stopped mid-reach towards the tub of fruit. after a beat he grabbed a slice as well. “um... i like watermelon? i used to have it a lot back home.” he chewed thoughtfully, as the sun cascading down on the pair was suddenly blocked out by a group of students standing above them. the two looked up at them, squinting into the bright sunlight. 

“you know, you don’t have to spend time with _him_ out of pity,” one of them sneered, jerking his head towards donghyuck. “you can come sit with us if you want an escape from the weirdo.” 

donghyuck bowed his head, his face turning red with shame. he was waiting for mark to agree and stand up, leaving donghyuck in the dust. nothing he wasn’t used to by this point, and he’d enjoyed the company for the morning at least. 

“n-no thank you. i’m fine here.” 

donghyuck’s head whipped up hearing this. he stared incredulously at mark, who met his gaze and smiled sweetly. he picked up another strawberry and ignored the other students still towering over them. 

“pfft, well... its your loss,” one of the group muttered as they sauntered away. 

the pair sat in silence for a short while, processing what had just occurred. donghyuck couldn’t believe his lucky stars that someone in school finally wanted to be his friend. 

mark laughed a little, and said “your face is as red as these strawberries, donghyuck.” he suppressed a giggle behind his hand. the tension broke and donghyuck yelled a ‘hey!’ before laughing and throwing a slice of fruit at the boy in front of him. it landed squarely on mark’s shirt and stained him. 

when donghyuck got home that afternoon he gushed to his mother about how he had made a new friend and he loved watermelon and could she please please please put some in with his strawberries for lunch from now on? when he’d left to go start his homework upstairs, the spring in his step undeniable, his mother allowed herself a few tears of pure relief that he had finally found someone. 

a week later when mark came over after school for dinner - who was all ‘please’s and ‘thank you’s and shy smiles - she knew donghyuck was in safe hands. 

☆

the two boys spent as much time as humanly possible together after this. they would sit together in class all day, laughing quietly at their newest inside joke which no one else could understand. most afternoons they would beg their parents to let the other come to their house after school where they would hang out, eat food, play games, all the while talking about everything and nothing. 

just a couple weeks ago they had celebrated donghyuck’s 13th birthday. even though as a young child he had dreamed of elaborate parties with more guests than he could count and presents stacked sky high, he much preferred getting to spend his birthdays with his mother, mark, and mark’s family. and he _loved_ the short period of time every summer where he and mark shared the same age. 

right now they were lazing around in donghyuck’s room, the sun beating down through the window on them. they had pushed it open as far as it would go, but the air outside was humid and sticky and any breeze that came gave no relief. despite the discomfort, both boys enjoyed this the most - the freedom of being off school for summer and getting to spend all their time together doing nothing in particular. 

donghyuck was lay on his back on his bed, limbs splayed out and his cheeks flushed red from the heat. mark was sat across the room, slumped over in the chair by donghyuck’s desk. neither of them had said anything in a while, but the silence was comfortable. what caught donghyuck’s attention, however, was the fact that the little noise signalling mark was getting a text had gone off for the fifth time in the last ten minutes. of course both of them had some friends besides just each other, but neither of their phones ever got this much activity from anyone but each other usually. 

donghyuck looked over at mark who was replying quickly and putting his phone down with a small smile on his face. “who’s that texting you?” he asked. 

mark stalled, looking as if he’d been caught red-handed. “it was uh... my mom.” he looked pointedly out the window to avoid donghyuck’s gaze. 

the younger boy continued to stare for a few seconds - they had never kept secrets before. he relented after a moment, deciding to change the subject. “do you want to go to the arcade tomorrow? they have a claw machine filled with the new cinnamoroll collection-“

“i’m busy tomorrow, donghyuck. sorry,” mark murmured in reply. 

“oh... okay. what are you doing?” 

mark stalled again. he opened and shut his mouth a couple times, before exhaling deeply. his cheeks were already tinted pink from the warm weather, but donghyuck could see the tips of mark’s ears turn bright red all of a sudden. 

“mark?”

“imgoingoutonadate.” 

donghyuck felt his stomach drop. surely he hadn’t heard that right. mark? on a _date_? 

“a date with who?” he probed. he ignored the nauseous feeling swirling around inside of him. he wasn’t sure if he really even wanted to know who it was. 

there was a long pause, the quiet now hanging awkwardly in the air. mark brought his gaze back to meet donghyuck’s, feeling exposed as he looked warily into the boy’s eyes. 

“it’s chaeun from class... i asked her out last week and she said yes,” he said as he twisted his fingers together in his lap.

donghyuck was trying to process the information desperately. he supposed it made sense? chaeun was sweet (and one of their few classmates who didn’t religiously bully donghyuck) and he guessed she was pretty as well. “why didn’t you tell me?” his voice was much weaker than he was expecting. 

the older boy’s eyes turned stony. “i didn’t think i had to,” mark’s said coldly. “am i meant to get approval from you for every decision i make?” he accused. “i asked her out because i wanted to. i’m almost 14, donghyuck. this is what we’re supposed to be doing by now.” he stood suddenly and grabbed his things from around the room. 

“a-are you leaving? i’m sorry, mark, i didn’t mean it like that.” donghyuck sat up in bed, feeling helpless as he watched mark shove his belongings in his backpack and head for the door. 

“whatever, donghyuck.” and with that he had gone. he heard mark say goodbye to his mother downstairs before the front door closed behind him. 

donghyuck sat stunned on his bed for a long while. of course he hadn’t meant to upset mark, but honestly he wasn’t sure what he had said that made him get so defensive. the sickly feeling inside him only grew as the day turned into evening into night. 

by the next morning the heat had finally broke, and after weeks on end of scorching sun there were dark grey clouds looming overhead. donghyuck tried not to think about mark, and the fact that him being angry with him made his insides feel twisty and uncomfortable. he couldn’t settle all morning, opting to sit in the living room with the tv on but watching the weather deteriorate as the sky got progressively darker instead. 

by early afternoon, just as the first drops of rain started to fall, there was a weak knock on the front door. donghyuck heard his mother answer it, not really paying much attention until she called out “duckie! can you come to the door please?” 

he shuffled through the house, only looking up to see who it was at the last moment. mark was stood in the doorway, wilted flowers in one hand, and a little box of chocolate covered strawberries in the other. donghyuck noticed that he’d dressed up for today and even styled his hair.

“can i come in please?” he murmured. the rain was picking up, and donghyuck took his wrist to gently pull him inside the house before mark got soaked. he didn’t let go of him until the two were upstairs in donghyuck’s room. mark put the gifts he was holding on the desk and made his way over to flop face first onto the younger boy’s bed. 

donghyuck stood idle, feeling lost, before he moved across the room to sit down next to mark on the bed. he could see his shoulders shaking minutely as he sniffled into the pillow. he placed his hand lightly on the back of mark’s shoulder and rubbed it in what he hoped was a comforting way. when the sniffling eased after a few minutes, donghyuck risked breaking the silence. 

“what happened?” 

mark lifted his head to look at him, his eyes puffy and bloodshot. donghyuck was suddenly reminded of the first day they met. he sat up on the bed sighing, and brought a hand up to rub away the tears still hanging on to his eyelashes. 

“she stood me up.” he looked down into his lap, and fresh tears landed on his jeans. “no text, no phone call, nothing.” he pushed the heel of his palms into his eyes to try and stop the tears flowing out as a sob racked through his chest. he moved his hands away, meeting his friend’s concerned gaze. “i waited there two hours, donghyuck.” 

and hearing that, donghyuck felt his heart break for mark. mark, the nicest person he knows. mark, who struggles to put himself first over his friends and family, even if he should sometimes. mark, who stood by him the day they met and has done unconditionally ever since. 

“you know what, mark? _fuck_ chaeun.” donghyuck rose from the bed as mark looked at him, his eyes wide with surprise at the boy’s choice of words. but he didn’t falter, and continued on. “fuck her for standing you up. i tell you what - we should eat those strawberries you got and watch a movie and forget all about her. deal?” he was already moving to collect the box of fruit mark had discarded and a few other snacks he kept in his room. he then went over to his shelf and picked out mark’s favourite movie. he put the dvd into his tv and the opening music of my neighbor totoro began to play.

he plopped himself back down on the bed next to mark, placing the snacks between them and instantly grabbing a strawberry. mark eyed him as he did so.

“you just wanted the strawberries didn’t you?” mark pretending to be accusing, but his laugh gave him away. 

“mark it would basically be a crime to let chocolate covered _anything_ go to waste - especially strawberries,” he said, giving the older boy a pointed look. 

around twenty minutes into the film, snacks promptly devoured, mark had lay down again with his head resting in donghyuck’s lap. the younger boy pet his hair gently, realising after a short while that mark was asleep. after the day he’d had, donghyuck didn’t want to disturb him now that he finally looked peaceful - his face relaxed and breathing even. much to his surprise, the twisty feeling returned to donghyuck’s stomach as he looked down at mark. he chalked it up to the amount of food he had eaten just now, nothing more. he just tried to focus on the film, and not the way his hand tingled as he ran mark’s soft hair between his fingers. 

☆

after the boys had turned 16 their mothers both let them experiment a little with their appearances. mark wasn’t really interested in doing anything different, keeping his hair black as it always had been. donghyuck, however, had been itching for his 16th so he could finally dye his hair. late on donghyuck’s birthday after the celebrations had finished, he and mark walked to the store to pick up a home dye kit. of course, donghyuck being donghyuck, he picked the brightest colour they had - a stunning cherry red. they also bought a couple boxes of bleach based on the advice from the store assistant. 

they spent the rest of the night bleaching and dyeing donghyuck’s hair, and despite the younger boy whining about his scalp hurting, he was smiling ear to ear after seeing the finished result. the colour made his tanned skin seem to glow, the warm tones complimenting each other beautifully. mark gulped looking at donghyuck looking at himself in the mirror, brushing his fingers through his hair. he’d never really noticed how pretty his best friend was before now. 

by the time summer finished and school had restarted, donghyuck had committed to the colour. he got some snide comments off some classmates who called him attention-seeking, but as far as he was concerned if he, his mother, and mark liked it, then he was happy. 

mark had joined the school’s ice hockey team the school-year prior, and their coach made no hesitation in getting them back into practice after summer had ended. his growth spurt combined with the regular exercise meant mark was starting to fill out more in his chest and shoulders, something which didn’t go amiss for donghyuck. he still felt that sickly, twisty feeling in his stomach a lot, and an awkward conversation with his mother in which she tentatively suggested maybe donghyuck had some feelings for mark had given him a lot to think about. 

he loved spending all his time with mark, especially when the pair would busk in one of their bedrooms, with mark strumming gently on his guitar and the two sharing vocals back and forth. or sometimes he’d zone out when they were watching a movie, blushing furiously when mark would look over and see donghyuck’s glazed over eyes looking at him. he liked to pretend he was just randomly losing focus, but deep down he knew it was something more. this was only further cemented as mark really started to come into his own and grow into his gangly limbs. but donghyuck just pushed this all under the rug for now, something to be dealt with another day.

the boys were back at donghyuck’s house on a saturday evening. today had been the important qualifying match to allow their school to participate in tournament games all year, and mark had scored the winning goal. his teammates had asked him if he wanted to join them at a house party later on, but when mark looked over to the bleachers and saw donghyuck’s beaming face he knew there was no doubt where he’d be tonight. 

as usual, they were sprawled out unceremoniously across donghyuck’s bed, watching anime reruns and eating whatever snacks his mother brought up to his room. this, of course, included their all-time favourite fruits. 

donghyuck was talking about the particular episode they were watching, gesturing wildly as he complained about how the writers had killed off the best character in the whole series, the strawberry in his hand threatening to fall out of his grasp. mark laughed along with donghyuck’s passionate rant. 

“dude, be careful! you’re gonna drop that strawberry and stain the floor again and you know your mom will be pissed,” mark said, laughing behind his hand. 

“i’m just saying - they had no right to kill her off halfway through! the rest of the show is a flop.” donghyuck huffed and looked back at the tv, shoving an entire strawberry sans stem into his mouth and chewing angrily. mark giggled at the sight, and donghyuck turned to look back at him, his faux-anger melting away as he gave a soft smile in return. 

they both watched the rest of the episode quietly, laughing gently at the jokes they had heard over and over already. when netflix asked if they were still watching, donghyuck sat up and looked at mark. 

“do you want to keep watching this or do something else? i just got mario kart if you want to play that?” 

mark pondered for a moment, before realising that donghyuck, god knows how, had a little droplet of strawberry juice on his cheek. any thought he had in his head vanished. 

donghyuck tilted his head at mark, but continued on. “um, or we could play animal crossing? or stardew valley? or we could just put some music on. we’re celebrating for you so whatever you want-“

donghyuck’s breath hitched in his throat as mark’s hand reached out, brushing his thumb over his face. 

mark only saw donghyuck’s dazzled expression after a moment, but the damage was done. 

“you just- i was only-“ he stammered. “you had a tiny bit of fruit juice on your cheek!” mark tried his best to not look like he was being really weird towards his best friend all of a sudden. he could feel donghyuck’s face heating up rapidly under the pad of his thumb and radiating into his hand. he moved it away quickly, apologising. 

“n-no, it’s fine,” the younger boy choked out a laugh, but he knew he must have looked flustered. “t-thanks.” 

without thinking, mark raised his thumb to his mouth to lick the juice still clinging onto his skin. if he thought he had damage control to do before, it was disaster control now. 

he watched as donghyuck looked back at him slack-jawed, before his hands flew up to cover his face. mark could see donghyuck flush bright red down his neck, creeping beneath the neckline of his shirt and then all the way up to the the very top of his head. he was blushing up to his scalp, his cherry red hair seeming only to emphasise the colour of his skin. 

“donghyuck! i’m sorry! that was weird, i don’t know why i did it. please, i’m so sorry.” mark was sputtering out anything he thought appropriate, praying his friend wouldn’t think he was a complete freak. after a few seconds of mark looking pleadingly at donghyuck’s hands covering his face, he uttered “please, donghyuck?” his tone much softer. 

the younger boy peeked between his fingers at mark. he could feel how hot his face was, but he couldn’t bear mark thinking he was annoyed with him. he exhaled, trying to let go of the apprehension that had built up high in the last few minutes. he pulled his hands away from his face and placed them in his lap, looking down as he twisted his fingers together - a habit he knew exactly where, or rather who, it had come from.

“it’s… it’s fine mark. don’t worry about it.” he exhaled deeply again, and peered up at mark who looked positively panic-stricken. “you just caught me off guard, is all.” donghyuck offered him a small smile, feeling it grow as he saw mark’s shoulders relax a little. “um… so mario kart?” 

mark laughed, the tension between them easing. “you know i’d kick your ass at mario kart any day - you’re on.” 

☆

they had each applied for a handful of different universities’ music courses, but naturally they ended up at the same school, in a lot of the same classes, and even in the same apartment. but this was surprising to no one. they were mark and donghyuck; donghyuck and mark - a package deal.

living together seemed like the obvious choice for the pair. they’d already spent over a decade attached at the hip, so there was never really any question about what their living situation would be. they had found a two bedroom apartment right near the bus stop that goes straight to campus. it was perfect, and an absolute steal (the realtor hinted that it might be haunted but that only sold donghyuck on it even more). 

it was their second year of university, and their dreaded week of winter semester exams were finished. 

the two had ordered pizza to celebrate, starting off their winter break on a high. after eating almost everything in the apartment, they were lazing about in the living room. donghyuck was sat beside mark on the sofa, leaning against him with his head resting on the older boy’s shoulder as mark was lazily fishing on animal crossing. the soft music from the tv and mark’s steady breathing were all donghyuck could hear, and he closed his eyes to cherish the serenity. 

he would be perfectly at peace, however the heavy feeling in his stomach from all the junk food he had eaten made him feel unsettled. he lifted his head from mark’s shoulder, who turned to look at him. 

“mark i’ll die if i don’t eat something fresh i swear.” donghyuck looked pleadingly at the other boy. his eyes were big and round, with soft, golden locks of hair framing his face in a way that only made him look even more irresistible. 

mark sighed and looked out the window - it was pitch black with big flakes of snow falling down. he looked back to donghyuck who was still trying to pout and look cute. “it’s literally 2am donghyuck, and it’s so cold out...” they looked at each other for a moment, wordlessly fighting their own case, before mark’s resolve finally broke. “...fine. but you’re paying.”

donghyuck emitted a quiet ‘ _yes!_ ’ under his breath as the two stood up and stretched, their joints cracking after being sat still for so long. they piled on woolly layers by the front door - hats, scarves, and gloves feeling much too hot inside the cosy apartment. however the temperature in the building’s hallway was frigid at best, and the night air was bitingly cold as the two stepped outside and began walking to their local 24/7 store. 

the snow flurry had eased a bit by now, with tiny flakes cascading slowly and landing upon the white expanse that crunched beneath their feet. mark looked over at donghyuck, and despite him having his scarf triple-wrapped around him, his cheeks and the tip of his nose were reddened. mark mentally connected the dots between the constellation of donghyuck’s freckles on his pink cheek. he had small flakes of snow littered on his hat and in the golden brown tufts of hair which peaked out from underneath it, and mark’s eyes followed donghyuck’s breath as it curled out in front of him and faded away into the night sky. 

he looked for another few seconds, watching donghyuck’s breath and listening to the rhythmic sound of the snow crunching as they walked. donghyuck suddenly glanced at mark. instead of the two sheepishly looking away, shy at being caught staring or being stared at as has happened many times in the past, they maintained each other’s captured gaze. donghyuck offered a sweet smile, his eyes creasing in the corners, before scrunching his red-tipped nose and looking ahead again. mark’s heart did a little flip in his chest, and he desperately willed his pulse to slow down. 

they didn’t speak until they arrived at the store a few minutes later. donghyuck bought a giant packet of fresh strawberries, and a little one of watermelon for mark. he picked up some other junk food, and mark questioned why he was doing that seems though they came out specifically for Not Junk Food, but donghyuck said they needed to restock after all they’d eaten tonight. donghyuck paid for what ended up being a giant shopping bag full of snacks, and they started to walk home. 

mark had offered to carry the bag, but donghyuck refused, and after this they walked in silence again. 

when they had arrived back to their apartment, donghyuck dashed inside to dig through the bag and find his precious strawberries, before padding away in his socks towards his bedroom. mark finished taking off his many outerwear layers and pushed off his shoes, lining both his and donghyuck’s up by the door. despite it nearing 3am and having his own comfy bed to rest in, he followed the younger boy who had left his door open expectantly. 

by the time mark was flopped on the bed as well, donghyuck was already eating his way through his packet of fruit. they sat together on the double bed, leaning back against the headboard and listened to the quiet, nighttime sounds of the city as they tumbled through donghyuck’s just barely open window. 

mark, for who knows how many times today, stole another glance at the boy beside him. the red on donghyuck’s cheeks and nose from the cold air outside had faded now, but mark noticed that there was a small, red patch on the corner of the boy’s mouth - from the strawberries no doubt. his lips were stained from the fruit as well, shining from the excess juice that had spilled out.

mark knew that friends didn’t look at their other friends like this. not with rose-tinted glasses and a sense of wanting that he could never really place. but right now, he wanted. he’d had donghyuck for over a decade - they’d had each other - but he wanted more. donghyuck turned to return mark’s intense gaze, their eyes locked together. 

he reached out, and with a featherlight touch he grazed his thumb across donghyuck’s lower lip. the tiny drops of strawberry juice there were caught and pushed away. he traced the outline of donghyuck’s lip to the corner of his mouth where the fruit had stained his skin and gently wiped the offending pigment away. he let his thumb rest there, unfolding his hand to hold the younger boy’s cheek delicately. 

mark looked back up from donghyuck’s lips to his eyes. they weren’t panicked or embarrassed like last time, and he wasn’t making any attempt to shy away. something about this moment just felt right, like the final piece of an intricate and evocative puzzle slotting into place. instead, donghyuck leaned into the touch, and pressed a soft kiss against the pad of mark’s thumb. 

the twisty feeling that had followed donghyuck ever since mark was stood up and later fell asleep in his lap was at an all time high. memories flashed by of him being alone as a child; meeting the boy with teary eyes who would become his other half; the ups and the downs; the moments they would shy away from each other and from their own feelings. the twisting inside donghyuck’s stomach wasn’t embarrassment or unease, but adoration, anticipation, and unerring love. 

he looked into mark’s eyes, trying to gauge what the older boy was thinking. his eyes fluttered shut at the sensation of mark’s fingertips caressing from his mouth and cheek to the back of his neck where he softly played with the hair on his nape. he felt mark thread his hand into his hair, sighing as he gently massaged and pulled on the golden strands. the callouses on mark’s fingers from years of playing guitar only heightened the sensation as skin grazed on skin. 

donghyuck tilted his head back into mark’s hand, yearning for more stimulation. he felt mark place his other hand on the side of his neck, silently asking for permission. donghyuck opened his eyes, his gaze hooded. he parted his lips, tongue wetting them briefly, and he saw mark watch the motion with intensity. he nodded his head so slightly, but mark read it with perfect clarity. 

they leaned in, hesitating so their lips were only millimeters apart and feeling each other’s breath hot fanning against their cheeks, before closing the distance. 

the kiss was chaste - testing the waters for the new but inevitable realm they were discovering together. the electricity was palpable, shockwaves racing up and down their bodies making the skin where they touched tingle and burn. mark tilted donghyuck’s head to the side and pressed himself in closer. he could taste the tang of the strawberries on donghyuck’s lips, the sweetness only drawing him further and further in. he gently squeezed the hand on the side of donghyuck’s neck, rubbing small, slow circles into the smooth skin there. 

they kissed like this for another moment or two, before mark pulled away. it was only then when he realised donghyuck hadn’t made a move to touch mark. he peered down at donghyuck’s hands which were resting awkwardly in his lap, trying to stop strawberry juice on his fingers from staining anything. 

mark looked back at donghyuck, who was smiling sheepishly at him. 

“i’m sorry - i just… didn’t want to get you all sticky. i’ll go wash my hands-” donghyuck rambled, making a move to get up from the bed. mark placed a hand over the younger boy’s wrist, stopping him. 

mark sat up, encircling his fingers around his wrist as he pulled donghyuck’s hand up towards his face. he eyed donghyuck, watching for a sign of hesitation as he placed the younger boy’s index finger by his lips.

“is this okay?” he spoke, his voice deepened from how affected he was. he used his other hand to gently massage up and down the younger’s arm. donghyuck nodded, watching with wide eyes as mark took the fingertip into his mouth and licked the red fruit juice away. his breath hitched in his throat at the feeling of mark’s tongue pressed against the pad of his finger. 

the sweetness combined with the subtle, salty taste of donghyuck’s skin only spurred mark on. he sucked clean each of donghyuck’s fingers, as the other boy looked on in awe before leaning his head back against the headboard and watching through heavy-lidded eyes. mark glanced up through his eyelashes and caught donghyuck’s gaze, before giving a hard suck on his little finger and pulling his mouth up with a soft _pop_.

he pressed a kiss against each of the fingertips, the gesture so loving that donghyuck felt his chest swell with such strong emotion that he thought he might tear up. 

after kissing his thumb, mark looked at donghyuck with earnest. the younger boy took his hand from mark’s gentle grasp and placed it against his cheek, caressing the delicate skin under his eye. mark leaned into the touch, and placed his hand on top of donghyuck’s. 

“i love you.” 

mark’s quiet words hung in the air, dangling tentatively as he watched for the other boy’s reaction. his hand had stopped its motion on mark’s cheek, his eyes wide. mark could see the flush rising up from under the collar of donghyuck’s shirt, turning his neck, his face, and the tips of his ears red. but his expression soon turned soft. donghyuck put his hand around the back of mark’s neck to pull him in close again. he kissed him sweetly, but they both ended up smiling too much and bumped teeth. 

“i love you too,” donghyuck whispered, the words floating in the miniscule space between them. 

mark smiled wide, and donghyuck reciprocated before they reconnected the kiss. gentle and sweet kisses, with tender grazes of fingertips on skin communicated to one another the happiness that they both felt. the relief washing over the two after years of misunderstood feelings and pining was exquisite. 

chaste kisses turned heated and became more passionate. mark put his hand through donghyuck’s hair once more, fingernails scraping lightly at the roots causing donghyuck to whine at the sensation. the younger wrapped his arms around mark’s neck, bringing their bodies closer together so they could feel each other’s chests rise and fall as they began to gasp for breath. 

mark tilted donghyuck’s head and pressed his tongue against the boy’s mouth, to which he was quickly allowed access. the taste of strawberries returned, and much stronger than it had been before. the combination of the sweetness of the fruit and the taste of donghyuck made mark feel dizzy, but he was desperate for more. 

he deepened the kiss, wrapping his free arm around donghyuck’s waist to press him into his body as closely as possible. donghyuck sighed, the hot breath getting caught and melting between them. he moved one of his hands linked at the back of mark’s neck and pushed it down below the collar of his shirt. the expanse of skin was hot under his hand, and donghyuck could feel where mark’s muscles would tense under his touch. 

mark detached himself from the kiss, leaving the two breathing heavily as they rested their foreheads together. donghyuck’s head was still pushed to the side, and mark eyed the freckles leading down from his cheekbone, to his jaw and ending on his neck. he ducked his head down, pressing a tender kiss to each and then sucking at the skin along his neck. 

before he could stop himself, donghyuck choked out a breathy moan from high in his chest. he dug his fingernails into the skin on mark’s back, and pulled him in as close as he could go. the older sucked hard, licking over the reddening area once to sooth it, before moving onto another unmarked area of sensitive skin. 

donghyuck was practically limp in mark’s hold, letting the unadulterated pleasure rack through him. he had his eyes shut, head fallen back into mark’s hand, with whimpers and moans falling from his lips. 

“mark- mark please.” he spoke before he could even register what he was saying. “please i want you to touch me,” he whined. 

mark moved back to look at donghyuck. his hair was darkened at the roots from the sweat building there, and angry red splotches decorated the tanned skin of his neck. his eyes raked down donghyuck’s body, soaking up the image of the boy coming undone. he saw that he was getting hard, his sweatpants doing nothing to conceal it. 

he looked back at donghyuck’s face, who was still blissed out with his eyes closed. mark placed a hand on donghyuck’s upper thigh, to which the younger boy’s eyes opened, burning with desire. 

“you want me to touch you here?” mark asked, almost teasingly. he inched his hand up donghyuck’s leg before cupping the clothed hardening length in his hand. donghyuck groaned, his hips bucking up into the touch automatically. 

donghyuck unwound his arms from around mark to lie back fully against the headboard, covering his face with his hands. “yes,” he whined, “please mark.” 

mark taunted him, giving small amounts of friction to donghyuck’s dick, who responded with high-pitched and breathy moans. he used his other hand to pull donghyuck’s arms away from his face, linking their hands together instead. 

“i want to see you,” mark said leaning in close, and pressed a kiss to the back of donghyuck’s hand. 

mark looked between donghyuck’s face, glowing with a sheen of sweat that looked immaculate on his tan skin, and the growing bulge in his pants. pre-come had dampened a spot on the front of the material, and mark removed his hand. 

donghyuck let out a whine, but it was cut off abruptly when he felt mark’s fingertips push under the waistband of his sweats. he smirked when he realised that donghyuck had forgone underwear today. 

“have you got any lube?” mark asked, before making any move to touch donghyuck. 

it took a second for some of the fog to clear from donghyuck’s brain. “i- uh. yeah. top drawer,” he spoke, pointing to the bedside cabinet. mark reached over him to grab it, laughing when he saw the bottle. 

“dude, seriously? strawberry lube? you’re addicted.” mark smiled behind his hand, trying to suppress any more laughter. 

“i just like them, okay! leave me alone,” the younger huffed, unlinking his hand from mark’s to hide his face again. 

mark softened, pulling donghyuck’s hands away from his face. he pressed a kiss onto his cheekbone, feeling the skin flush hot there almost immediately. he leaned back, petting donghyuck’s hair. “i think it’s cute,” he offered comfortingly, and donghyuck smiled shyly back. 

mark turned his attention back to the daunting task of his first ever handjob, pushing the waistband of donghyuck’s sweatpants down below his dick. he squeezed a pump of lube into his hand, trying to warm it slightly first. he intertwined his unlubed fingers back with donghyuck’s, before stroking at the head of his dick. he rubbed his thumb over the slit, the pre-come which had already dribbled out mixing with the lube. he gave a few strokes, testing different pressures and movements before finding a rhythm that seemed to be working well, based off donghyuck’s reactions. the noises he was making became increasingly explicit. as mark stroked him along his shaft, tightening his grip slightly as he reached the head occasionally, donghyuck would choke out a high pitched moan or even rasp out mark’s name, squeezing his hand as he did. donghyuck bucked his hips up on every other stroke, fucking himself messily into mark’s fist. 

the image in front of him accompanied by donghyuck’s obscene noises were going straight to mark’s own cock, his hard length aching for attention and making it difficult to focus. 

“d-donghyuck, can you… please...” mark could feel himself coming undone, and was desperate for donghyuck to unravel him completely. the younger looked at mark with fervour and separated their hands. he ignored the lube bottle, cast aside on the sheets along with the long since forgotten packet of strawberries, spitting into his hand instead. mark’s hand slowed as he savoured the image of donghyuck reaching under his waistband and grasping his dick. the filth of it all made mark shudder from head to toe. 

they both stroked one another until their breaths were shortened gasps, each kiss they shared hot and messy. donghyuck was the first to speak again, his voice hoarse and shaky. “mark- i’m gonna cum,” he whined into the older boy’s neck. 

“okay, baby. cum for me,” mark whispered into his hair, and after a few final strokes donghyuck came hard. ropes of cum coated mark’s hand, donghyuck’s shirt and his sweats. mark jerked him off through his orgasm, and rested his hand on donghyuck’s navel as he came down. 

as some clarity came back to donghyuck, he finished mark off. he worked his hand slick with spit and pre-come over the length, until mark’s breath became short and heavy gasps. after a few more strokes, he came in his underwear with a low groan. donghyuck removed his hand, leaving it hovering awkwardly above the bedding. 

they both lay there for a while - sweaty and exhausted, trying to catch their breath. basking in the afterglow, mark looked over at donghyuck. his heart felt so full, and he gave donghyuck a toothy, giddy smile before getting up and padding towards their shared bathroom. he returned after a minute, his own fingers wiped clean, with a box of tissues. he took precious time cleaning up the mess over donghyuck’s stomach and hand. he tucked donghyuck back into his sweatpants, and lightly traced his fingers over the curves and dips of his abdomen, making the younger boy shiver. he pressed a tender, lingering kiss to the hot skin of donghyuck’s navel. 

mark discarded the dirty tissues and lay down on the bed, with his head snuggled into the plush pillows. he tugged on donghyuck’s arm so he would lie down with him, pulling him in against his chest. the couple’s breathing began to even out and slow as sleep beckoned them both. 

mark spoke suddenly. “do you remember the day we first met - you asked me what my favourite colour was and i said i didn’t know?” his voice was quiet and gravelly, making donghyuck shiver again. 

“mm,” came the younger’s response. 

“it’s red. ever since i met you it’s been red.” mark whispered the words into donghyuck’s hair and pressed a kiss there to seal his words in donghyuck’s heart forever.

**Author's Note:**

> welp here it is !!!! thank u for reading <3 this was my first time writing smut so hhhhshdjsjsh pls be gentle ;;
> 
> title is from heart attack - chuu
> 
> thank u thank u thank uuuuuuu to cami for beta-ing as i wrote this, and to barb for being my Final Beta once again !!


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